Hello beautiful souls, I hope you are all doing well. As an artist and a mother, happiness is something I think about a lot — today I want to share what it truly means to me.
We all have the right to shape our lives as we wish. You can choose to pursue an education, become a parent, or set your own rules by creating something new for yourself. I believe this process, which we all experience, is part of what defines our happiness.
Happiness has been a topic revisited by philosophers throughout history. There seems to be no definitive answer to what truly makes a person happy, as everyone is unique in their own way.
However, when I look at social media these days — on TV or my phone — it appears so easy to achieve happiness; we are given the impression that it is something you can acquire simply by doing what you like. For example, if you buy a particular item or look a certain way, you will be happy. It seems as though happiness is conditional: if you do this or that, you will be happy.
I think we can all agree that we cannot rely on every piece of content we see, as most of it is commercial, selective, and carefully curated to be shared with the world. To make things visually appealing and attract an audience, people often turn reality into a fantasy, giving the impression of a perfect life. It is all about expectation versus reality.
So, what can you do to find your own happiness?
1. Stop living in "ifs" and comparing yourself to others
With the rise of influencers on social media, we see people living seemingly perfect lives and start to wonder, " Why am I not like them? If I do this or that, maybe I will be happy too. If I get slimmer, maybe I will be happy. If I find a partner, maybe I will be happy. When we are stuck in this state of "if" and "maybe", it becomes toxic because it makes you feel that happiness only comes after you have achieved something, that it is impossible to feel happy now because it will only come later, as a result of your actions.
But that is not the case; happiness is available now. It is something we can all access at any time in our lives. A simple smile, a little sunshine on your face, waking up in the morning — the simple things in life can make us happy.
"Stop pretending that life is a trial. Live this day as if it were your last. The past is past and gone. The future is not guaranteed." — Wayne Dyer
Remember, even if you achieve everything you think will make you happy, what then? There will always be something else; life goes on, you evolve, your goals become higher, and happiness seems to be something we can never fully grasp.
2. Start living in the present
Living in the present is the only way to free yourself from the anxiety that comes from thinking about the future. You should not compromise your present with "ifs" or "maybes". It is important to have desires and goals, but achieving them alone will not make you happy. The present is precious, and you should not spoil it with constant thoughts and plans; remember that many things can bring you happiness.
3. Be more grateful for life
Another way to develop a positive attitude is through gratitude and appreciation for those around you. Sometimes it is good to pause, look around, and acknowledge what you have achieved and what you have now — the people in your life who love you, your home, family, children, job, and simply being alive. Take it all in and say thank you; be grateful for what you have and stop focusing on what you do not have.
With this mindset, you become more open to the little things. For example, you may want to travel but lack the time or means, yet you live in a beautiful country you have not explored. Become a tourist in your own country; get out and discover new places now and then. This small shift in mindset offers a new, more positive perspective, rather than just imagining what might happen in the future.
4. Be human
It is okay not to be happy all the time; it is part of being human. No one can live in a constant state of happiness, despite what social media suggests. As humans, we have the right to experience a range of emotions throughout the day, and that is normal because it is what makes us human. That is what separates us from non-living things.
Many of us today feel we have failed if we do not settle down, raise a family, become wealthy, or achieve certain milestones, and we feel guilty for experiencing life's ups and downs. We need those highs and lows, the difficult times, to learn and grow stronger. Those bad moments help us appreciate the days when everything is perfect.
Happiness, to me, is a feeling we constantly strive for in our lives. An important way to achieve this is to discard or minimise the "ifs" and remember to be more grateful for what we have, rather than focusing on what we lack. It is also important to realise that it is entirely human to feel down sometimes and not to feel guilty, as those feelings help us appreciate the better days.
If this resonated with you, I would love to hear from you. Please leave a comment below and share one thing that makes you truly happy right now. Let us inspire each other. If you enjoyed this, please return for more — there is much more I wish to share with you. God bless you, keep grinding, and stay positive. 💙
Yours truly,
Viviane